Military Child Custody Cases in Missouri

Missouri law protects military parents from losing custody of their children simply because they’re called to serve. State law prevents courts from using deployment or potential deployment as the sole reason to permanently change custody arrangements. If modifications are made to a custody order during one parent’s deployment, these changes automatically end within 30 days of the service member’s return home.

The child custody firm of SK Law has helped clients throughout the St. Charles area understand their rights in difficult legal situations. We know how Missouri courts apply these protections in real cases.

How Missouri Protects Military Parents in Custody Cases

Missouri recognizes the unique challenges military families face during deployment. State law provides several protections to ensure service members don’t sacrifice their parental rights while serving our country.

The core principle is straightforward. A parent’s absence, relocation, or inability to follow custody orders can’t justify changing custody if the reason is military activation and out-of-state deployment. This protection applies to members of the Army, Navy, Air Force, Marine Corps, Coast Guard, National Guard, and all reserve components.

These are some of Missouri’s important child custody rules if either parent is deployed:

• Courts can only issue temporary custody orders during deployment.
• Missouri law requires that orders modifying custody or visitation due to deployment be temporary and bars final modification until 90 days after deployment ends. However, courts retain the power to enter permanent orders for other reasons.
• When the military parent returns, the original custody arrangement automatically goes back into effect.

What Courts Consider in Military Custody Cases

Like all custody decisions in Missouri, military cases focus on the child’s best interests. Courts evaluate several factors, including:

• Each parent’s capacity to care for the child
• The child’s relationship with each parents
• The child’s adjustment to home, school, and community.

For military families, additional considerations come into play. The court looks at how deployment affects the parent’s ability to exercise custody or visitation rights. Missed visitation time due to military duties doesn’t count against a service member when courts evaluate whether a parent has failed to exercise their rights.

Note that Missouri law encourages parental agreements in which both parents outline their agreed custody arrangements. However, this is not required. Courts can act without agreement, but the deploying parent must provide copies of military orders to the non-deploying parent within 10 days of receiving them.

Temporary Modifications During Deployment

When a military parent deploys, existing custody arrangements may need temporary adjustments. Courts can modify orders to reasonably accommodate both parties during the deployment period.

These temporary orders must include specific provisions. The deploying parent retains custody or reasonable visitation during any leave periods, unless it’s not in the child’s best interest. The non-deploying parent must keep the court and the deploying parent updated with current address and phone information within seven days of any changes.

A military parent can also delegate their visitation rights to a family member during deployment. This includes grandparents, aunts, uncles, adult siblings, or step-parents who have a close relationship with the child. The delegated visitation can’t exceed what the original order granted to the deploying parent.

Federal Protections Under the Servicemembers Civil Relief Act

Beyond Missouri state law, military parents have federal protections through the Servicemembers Civil Relief Act (SCRA). This law allows service members to request a stay (pause) of court proceedings for at least 90 days when military duties prevent them from participating. The stay is available on proper application, with possible additional stays at the court’s discretion.

According to the Library of Congress summary of the SCRA, courts cannot consider deployment as the sole factor when deciding permanent custody changes. The law also requires military departments to provide service members with an annual notice of these child custody protections.

Some military parents ask if their child custody case will need a guardian ad litem (GAL), a court-appointed third party advocating for the child’s best interests. Missouri’s deployment statute and the SCRA do not contain a blanket requirement that a GAL be appointed whenever a stay is denied, and proceedings continue. GAL appointment is generally discretionary based on case circumstances. 

Our experienced attorneys at SK Law understand how these overlapping state and federal protections work together to safeguard military parents’ rights.

Rights and Responsibilities of Non-Deploying Parents

Missouri law places specific obligations on the parent who isn’t deploying. Non-deploying parents must:

• Make the child reasonably available to the military parent during leave periods
• Facilitate phone and email contact during deployment
• Provide timely information about the child’s location, housing, and education.

Courts can award attorney’s fees against either parent who fails to cooperate. This includes unreasonable delays in resolving custody matters, failure to accommodate the other parent, or not providing required information like military orders or income details.

Jurisdiction During Deployment

One concern for military families involves which state has authority over custody matters. Missouri addresses this directly. Once a custody order exists in Missouri, the state retains exclusive jurisdiction even if the child is temporarily absent during deployment.

The child’s absence from Missouri during deployment is considered temporary. Other states can’t claim the case based on the child being physically present elsewhere. While deployment can be used to argue that Missouri is an inconvenient forum, courts can still consider all circumstances, including deployment, in an inconvenient‑forum analysis.

Expedited Hearings for Deploying Parents

Military parents facing imminent deployment can request expedited court hearings. When military duties materially affect a service member’s ability to appear at a regularly scheduled hearing, courts must provide faster alternatives.

Deploying parents can also testify remotely. Missouri law allows participation by telephone, video conference, or internet when in-person attendance isn’t possible. This is so that military parents can still present their case even when stationed far from home.

What Happens When Deployment Ends

Within 30 days of returning from deployment, the original custody order automatically reinstates. The temporary modifications end, and the pre-deployment arrangement takes effect again.

If the non-deploying parent believes the original order is no longer appropriate, they bear the burden of proving it’s not in the child’s best interest. Courts must set any non-emergency motions for hearing within 30 days. For allegations of immediate danger or irreparable harm to the child, courts must hold emergency hearings within 10 days of filing.

Supporting Data on Military Families

According to the Department of Defense 2024 Demographics Report, 35% of DOD personnel have children. That’s 707,520 service members with kids at home. In addition, the average age of service members’ children is just 8 years old. These families face unique challenges balancing military service with parenting responsibilities.

Frequently Asked Questions

Can I lose custody permanently because I’m deployed?

No. Missouri law specifically prohibits courts from using deployment or potential deployment as the sole factor for permanently changing custody. Any custody modifications during deployment must be temporary.

Can someone else exercise my visitation rights while I’m deployed?

Yes. You can ask the court to delegate your visitation rights to a family member with a close relationship to your child. This includes grandparents, aunts, uncles, adult siblings, or step-parents.

What if I can’t attend a custody hearing due to military service?

You can request a stay of proceedings under the Servicemembers Civil Relief Act. You can also ask for an expedited hearing or permission to participate remotely through video conference or phone.

Does my ex have to let me see my child during leave?

Yes. Missouri law requires the non-deploying parent to make the child reasonably available during your leave periods and to facilitate phone and email contact throughout your deployment.

Key Points to Remember

• Deployment alone cannot be the sole justification for permanent custody changes in Missouri.
• Modifications made “due to deployment” must be entered as temporary orders and automatically end no later than 30 days after return. Permanent orders can still be made later based on a full best‑interest analysis.
• Original custody orders automatically reinstate within 30 days of returning.
• Federal and state laws work together to protect military parents.
• Courts must accommodate remote participation and expedited hearings.

Contact SK Law for Help With Your Family Law Case

If you’re a military parent facing custody concerns related to deployment, understanding your rights is the first step toward protecting your relationship with your child.

Nathan A. Steimel and Joseph R. Kuhl are respected attorneys serving clients throughout the St. Charles, Missouri, area. Visit their lawyer profiles to learn more about their experience and results. Call (636) 946-9999 to schedule a consultation.